A rule for living in the world
First published in 1909
Saint Petersburg, Russia
The beginning, the root and the heart of everything is loving God. But for us this beginning is at the end of our priorities; we love everything there is in the world more than God. Yet we shall love God so much that everything apart from Him should be secondary to us. His law should be above all human law to us. His advice should be above all other advice. We shall fear offending Him immeasurably more than we fear offending another person.
Loving God means loving Him far more than we love our father, mother, children, wife, husband, brother or friend; yet we don't even love Him as much as we love them. Whoever loves God already also loves his father, mother, children and brother much more than whoever is attached to them more than he is attached to God. The love of the latter person is a mere illusion, a deeply worldly love. This love can't think and act clearly, for it is blind.
True love is light, not darkness; in love we find God, not the spirit of the darkness. Where there's light, there's peace; where there's darkness, there's chaos and discord. That is why the sort of love that takes its root in God is firm and also makes us firm, while the sort of love that doesn't is flimsy and shaky and makes us flimsy, shaky and faint-hearted also. And that is why all earthly love should always seek to be deeply rooted in God.
Earthly love that comes from God is thereby made purer and grander, for it wants us to love our neighbour and brother much more than we do. It wants us to help them not only materially but also spiritually; help not only their bodies but also their souls; feel sorrow not for whatever transgressions they commit against us but for the impact that has on their souls. For their sin is our sin also; we should have done a better job at instructing them and guiding them towards God. Yet how can we do that if we ourselves are weak and feeble? Everything is possible for him who walks in God and His love, otherwise nothing is. To guide someone else, we must first guide and cultivate ourselves.
How do we cultivate ourselves, then? We ought to incessantly contemplate our duties and read books with characters who are similar to us in background and stature; and we ought to continuously check all of that against Christ's law. We should accept what is in accordance with the law and reject anything that contradicts it, for anything that doesn't come from God isn't the truth. If we find something we're unsure about, we should simply put it away for some time and never feel ashamed of it. That just means we're not ready for it yet, but we'll eventually arrive at being able to understand it as we continue cultivating ourselves.
We should always steer clear of all arguments, no matter how much we disagree with someone or how wrong they might be. We should not lose our temper or try to prove them wrong; we should instead close our mouth and contemplate what's at hand with a clear mind. Yet even then we should keep quiet if we can't express ourselves in a way the other person would understand, or if we can't remain calm and collected while doing so. A truth expressed in anger aggravates instead of convincing. Thus we can only guide and spiritually aid another when we ourselves have become perfectly meek and gentle, when no insult can offend us. Thus our mind is illuminated, and we can notice others' transgressions so that we can learn to overcome them ourselves. Thus God aids us in everything. That's the true way of life: to guide yourself and others; to help yourself get closer to God and help your neighbour to do the same.
In all our endeavours we should be most wary of our worst enemy, which is despondency. Indeed, despondency is a mighty temptation of the devil that he attacks us with knowing just how weak we are against it. Despondency is an insult to God; it's the result of us not having enough love for Him. Despondency brings despair, which is the death of our soul and the worst of our transgressions; it impedes us in striving to salvation, which is why God hates it above all other sins. That’s why in our daily prayer we ask God for a sober mind, a pure heart and freedom from all despair.
Sometimes God gives us spiritual hardships that appear similar to despair to test us and see if we’ve grown stronger in character. Sometimes He does this so that in seeking solance from worries and despair we would come up with something we wouldn't even think of doing otherwise. God is always seeking our good and for us to strive to know His will. That's why many of those who were hardened through hardship recommend that we take a close look at our past life and try to remember all the times we failed to do something or decided to put it off for later. Once we remember, we should set our daily routines aside and focus on what we failed to do; we should keep focusing on those tasks for as long as we feel lost and despondent. What's more, we should treat them as given by God and labour on them akin to a novice who readily obeys their prior in everything.
We'll hardly get to have a single peaceful minute on Earth, and we should remember that always. Worries and anxieties of all kinds come at us one after another every day. We're in this world to wage a spiritual battle, not celebrate; we'll get to enjoy celebrating our victory on the other side. While here, we must fight incessantly and never lose our heart. We must seek to grow in virtue, diligently fulfill our duties and make sure everything we do is in accordance with our Lord's law. We don't have the time to even think about cowardly fleeing the battlefield, for every step brings us another opportunity for cultivating virtue and bringing ourselves closer to Heaven. The more dangers we face, the harder we should work and pray.
O you on the battlefield, keep that always before your eyes! Stand firm in your faith and be courageous, for at the end of the road you shall see God and eternal joy! Yet being as mad, careless and shortsighted as we are, we never look at the end of the road and therefore never have the good spirits to keep going. We only see the obstacles, never caring to realise they're merely our stepping stones towards perfection. What's more, we often see things in a wrong light: tiny heels seem like mountains to us, trifles feel like grand undertakings and ghosts appear real. We overestimate every hardship and fear it, for we keep our eyes down and stubbornly refuse to look up. For if we looked up even for a few moments, we'd only see God and His light and laugh at ourselves for being so blind. Let us support every single of our endeavours with ceaseless inner prayer, but not the kind of prayer we're so used to mindlessly repeating every day. No, let us pray with our entire soul so that afterwards we could cross ourselves and get the strength to get back to work.
Let us never despair if God does not instantly answer our prayer; on the contrary, that's when we should rejoice and keep praying even more! That's how we can grow in hope. For God, in His infinite wisdom, often gives some people things others will only receive at the end of their journey. Yet blessed—so much more blessed!— is he who is destined to labour much to receive what another would receive for working much less. By the time he gets there, his soul will be much better prepared for and worthy of those gifts. 'But he who endures to the end will be saved', said our Lord and thereby unravelled the greatest mystery of life for us; yet we don't even want to give it a passing thought, let alone comprehend it.
We shall never succumb to gloom, but should instead strive to bring light to our souls. God is light, and thus we must also seek light. God is the highest joy, and thus we must also be bright-faced and joyous. We must be particularly joyous when everything is against us, as if trying to drive us to confusion and despair. Otherwise there's no merit in that. It's not too hard to be joyous when surrounded by pure joy; anyone could do this, even those with no faith or discipline, even non-Christians or pagans. The dignity of a Christian lies in preserving joy whilst in sorrow. If not, how are we different from pagans?
Let us seek to be guided by our love for God in everything; let us always have it before our eyes. Blessed is he who does everything He does for God alone. He'll swiftly walk his path and easily overcome what others might think impossible. The entire world will then appear to him in a completely different light, in its true form. He’ll only settle in the world because God put him here and told him to settle; but in the world, he’ll only love those things that are of His image. He won't bow down before earthly life like an idolater who bows down before an image thinking it to be God. He'll bow down before it like a man enlightened by his faith, thinking this love to be a semi-decent art piece that's only on display to remind us we should keep our eyes on the One whose image we can't behold with our mortal eyes. We should only see our earthly love—however beautiful and pure it might be—as a visible sign of God's infinite love, next to which everything pales in comparison. All of it is just a bunch of sparkles, mere hems of the majestic robe worn by God's love, infinite and insurmountable. Nothing can fit it, just as nothing can fit God Himself.
